I Have a Story

I have a story - one that I keep mainly a secret for now, that I hope to someday share. I've exposed it very little - only when I felt it was necessary to continue living - to a few people who were at the right place and the right time. Some might see this story as personal and therefore able to be kept secret forever, never meeting the light of scrutiny and love it may garner. I see it as something that lives inside of me, pressing buttons and writing speeches that are never delivered.

Some days, like today, something happens to remind me of this story, and I feel compelled to climb on to the nearest roof and scream it, from beginning to end; but I know those times and this time are not the right time to share. And furthermore, I beat myself up over "not the right time", because I know that in my heart, there is no right or wrong time. My story has an agenda - a cause- and every day it stays a locked in that secret place, I feel I'm missing a battle that needs it - that needs me.

There is a story that happened, that exists in history, and leaves me with days like today when I wonder, when will I be able to tell this story? When will I feel comfortable to take what will inevitably be given in return?